One Last Caress (feat. Miss Fits)

Pierce Brosnan. (5/16/1953)

And. 

Liberace. (5/16/1919)

Krist Novoselic, you came as you were, too. (5/16/65) 

Entertain us. 

Fuck, I don’t feel stupid. Or contagious. 

But. 

I do wonder where you slept last night. 

Actually, I don’t. 

Stay in the Pines. Love.

I have learned the dark, is not where the cold wind blows.

It Is not where the sun never shines.

I have, and, will again, shiver the whole night through. 

Maybe two. Maybe eleven. 

I looked through the broken window. I thought you should know. 

Your face holds a story about the places you’ve been. 

Without honesty, my face, my story. Feels like sin. 

Regardless. 

Here I am. I came as I was. Born of Mother. Raised by a Strong. Hand.

I have never felt my fathers. Never heard his voice.

No idea his eyes, his face, his reasons, his hate, his family….My. Fate.

My child hood is a collapsed star; questions so intentional and lovingly curious. 

Disregarded. 

Lost in a blackhole. 

I am my mothers daughter. 

I have learned she led her life, each day, as if it was her first rodeo.

I was raised in the holding pen, with the bull kept tight. On my back, the braided rope gripping around my chest. That holding pen, with its aggression and fear, I believed was never there. I became Love. I caresseed my fear. I learned traumatic roots (that spare no family tree), last longer than 8 seconds. I also want MOST things to last longer than 8 seconds ('cept my first..). I am LIVING and still learning to love myself more than...fuck...anyone ever probably has. That is tough. So, Dude...

…WHOEVER YOU ARE…

The Sun Shines, I have found, through the. Pines.

Through broken hearts and fear.

Through bullshit and six feet of dung. 

I don’t care where you slept last night. 

I want your hand in the morning light. 

Honey. 

Today is all the light we will know. 

One fucking night though, 51 years ago, I was born.  I imagine it was mess. 

Mama, know you are the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

I am eternally grateful for the breath I began to take. On. My. OWN.

On this. DAY. 

(just so ya know, it's my 51st fucking. Row-DAY- nOHHHHHH)

And, we can all breath to that. Here's to the breath caressing you.